Ended. And shit it hurts.

Dear my love,

I've been thinking about it. I've been wanting to end it. But I never expect it to hurt so much when it actually did. Oh yeah. It ended.

I didn't even cry, but I'm fully aware that my heart is currently bleeding. It feels so painful. Maybe it's my ego that makes me do not even want to cry, but I would be lying if I said I was actually happy with what we had. Probably I was, in the beginning. But lately it had been more towards hurting me than making me happy.

I loved you, and still am loving you. But I've been realising all this time that it seemed to be not working out and yet I had been trying my best to fix it. Maybe it was just because we never meant to be. Or maybe we are better off as friends.

Do I feel regret? No, I don't. It taught me something important. Probably it's my lost, or maybe it's actually your lost and not mine. It doesn't matter anymore though. The fact that we ended it without even trying to fix it is a proof enough for me, that none of us bothered about this anymore.

Still. I didn't expect it to be so painful.

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Dear Dini,

Thank you so much to listen to me rambling about this at 6am in the morning. You have no idea how much you actually make me feel relieved and better with your words. You've been the greatest friend I ever had and those words meant alot to me. I wouldn't be able to make it through the morning if it wasn't because of you.

Just like what you said before. Maybe it's for the best. And I believe that this is just God giving me a new beginning. Nek, thanks alot for being there for me when I need a shoulder to cry on. Love you.